Coming Out

Staying Silent No More: I Am A Christian Ally

by Evelyn Shoop

e”In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” – Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

In my heart, I’ve always known that God is a God of Love. That at its core, the Bible preaches Love—a hand for the downtrodden, glory for the cast-asides, another chance for your enemies, and boundless, difficult Love.

Here we are, all of us, formed perfect by a Loving hand.

Still, when I write about religion, mostly I sit in front of a blank screen with my cursor blinking back and forth. My faith is personal and I’m not fully formed, so I’ve been quiet. It’s taken a long time for me to sit here in front of you, coming out as an ally.

I’ve been quiet because I haven’t had to speak up.

I am straight. I haven’t had to sit down and have difficult conversations with my family members, or worry about being bullied by my peers or my faith community. For me, it has been enough that I treat my gay friends as unbroken and wholehearted, and that my church is tolerant. It’s enough, right? It’s enough.

In the moment that I saw this quote from Dr. King,—and oh, the beauty of God finding us in the right moment—I was rationalizing my silence about God, homosexuality, and radical acceptance into a lovely little present of non-judgment.

But my silence wasn’t a gift. It was a way to share part of myself with the world, but not all of me. It was part of a lifelong fear of conflict and a desire to keep everyone happy. And who am I if not the broken, but perfect child of God?

It started with a tweet or two about #faith, #equality, and #LGBT; then a post about a new scouting movement that embraces all people. And then, Here I Am.

Here I am, God—years after liking Believe Out Loud on Facebook for the first time.

I’m sharing all of who I am. And here are some things I know to be true.

  • LOVE is the core of everything. All caps, radical, boundless love. Some love is easy—our souls want it and want to give it. Some love is hard—loving our enemies, sometimes ourselves, often those who are different from us.
  • God is the only one to judge. We are all walking this earth doing the best we can, trying to blow oxygen on the fire of goodness inside us, and nothing we do here is good enough for salvation but through God’s grace and His alone. So we should probably be careful about condemning people.
  • Sins are a choice. Adultery is a choice. Greed is a choice. Being gay or queer is not a choice. Who would choose it? It’s difficult. It sets you apart. It subjects you to ridicule. It marks you as other. But not for things that eat away at your soul or destroy your relationships or tie you to money and greed—but for being who you are and searching for Love.

So here I am, God—coming out as an ally to the LGBT community.

Knowing that there’s just no way my soul can be right with itself, except by your radical, boundless Love.

Originally published on momsicle; Image via flickr user Sunfrog1

Comments (9)


Yes and Yes and Yes!!!
Yes and Yes and Yes!!!

A friend and I just had this massive debate thread with two of her facebook “friends” after she reposted the “Silent No More” post last week from right here on Believe Out Loud. And this is all that I wish I could have said. Thank you.

Amy Alford

Great! Thank you for your
Great! Thank you for your brave and right words! You are a blessing and a LEADER, and your voice is needed and appreciated! 🙂

Lauren V.

I consider myself a straight
I consider myself a straight ally — but I do not believe in God. Thank you for reminding me that the voice of Christianity isn’t always filled with hate speech. May your voice be joined by a louder, joy-filled chorus! Whatever our beliefs or non-beliefs, here’s to singing the same song of love.

Taylor Stuart

I stand with you friend
I stand with you friend


You know I have been
You know I have been following your blog for some time, Evelyn and you mine, I want to say how much I appreciate all your words. This really is your coming out. It’s sad that anyone has to come out, but I am proud to know you, even if it is on the internet. It’s great to know my family has such an ally in you. Though we differ in our religious beliefs, posts such as these make me remember that not every Christian has to be the radical and condemning type. Thanks for the reminder!


Rachael, it means a lot to me
Rachael, it means a lot to me that you came over here and left a note. I really value how open and honest you are, and it’s time for me to do the same! Glad to know you, too.


Thank You, Thank You, your
Thank You, Thank You, your blog is the information I need for my thesis that I am writing at Chicago Theological Seminary


Thank you for this. I am a
Thank you for this. I am a gay woman and I am also a Christian. Its strange and sad that its almost harder for me to say that I’m Christian that to say that I’m gay. A friend and I were talking about how it seems like it can be equally hard to “come out” as a believer as it is for people to “come out of the closet.” Its been a difficult path for me and for awhile, I couldn’t even say the “C” word; I would only refer to myself as a “follower of Jesus.” I still feel that, but I’m starting to intertwine my connection to the LGBTQ community and my connection to a Christian community. I look forward to more of us, and more straight, Christian allies continue to come out. LOVE


YES. Bless you. I have been

YES. Bless you. I have been saying this for years.. I have watched with absolute sadness as so many of my lovely friends in the LGBT community were harassed by their family, friends, and even members of their church for something they never chose to sign up for. It is our job as Christians to love as radically as Jesus, not pass hatred and judgement onto those who already face so much persecution. You rock.

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